Forrest Gump said it best "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get"
The problem is that I always cut my chocolates in half to see what's on the inside, if I don't like it, I don't eat it... I leave it in the box and hope that someone somewhere likes that nasty coconut filled chocolate and I don't have to eat it.
I wish real life was like that. Where you could ask for a half glimpse into the future in any given situation to know what the outcome might be and if you don't like it you don't have to continue, you can just move on to the next chocolate.
Unfortunately life is not like this. We must "live and learn"...and I hate it. I hate that life takes those that deserve life from us and and leaves shitty people here on earth. Murderers and rapists and the lowest scum continue to live on when loved ones die.
It just doesn't seem fair anymore. I work and work and try to live a good life yet I struggle to find meaning in it. What's my purpose and why haven't I figured it out yet? I know that in time and when it's right everything will happen but I just don't feel "full" anymore. Dance has been the only thing that has kept me sane lately, it's my escape, my muse.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Friday, May 23, 2008
Life is short - eat dessert first
In light of this week's events I have a different outlook on life. Not that I had too different of one before, it's just that I was reminded how precious and short life can be. My perspective has changed slightly.
Today I will be attending the funeral of a beloved co-worker who tragically passed away on Sunday night at the age of 30. I will also be visiting the gravesite of my godmothers father who passed away 19 years ago on this day. Today is also my mother's 50th birthday.
I think many of us take advantage of what our time on this earth is meant for... it's meant to live and experience and share. Too many of us work too hard, worry too much and don't live enough.
I decided a long time ago that although I have responsibilites and I do have to be a grown up I will not let that stop me from enjoying every minute that I have on this earth. I have travelled more in the last 3 years then most people have in their life. I have some of the BEST friends any person could ask for and the BEST family that any person could ask for. I laugh everyday and tell all of my friends that I love them because in the event that I do leave unexpectedly, I want everyone to know what they meant to me. I don't waste time with people who do not treat me right or who do not want me. I do not love recklessly because I save it for those that deserve it. I love french fries and chocolate and strawberries.
I dance because it is my passion and it's what makes me the happiest. I coach because sharing my passion to those who share the same passion is amazing. I teach kids because there's nothing better than seeing children who want nothing more than to learn from you, so much that they even copy your style of clothing. I love children because they love selflessly and unconditionally. I have 4 year old boyfriends who are the cutest things I've ever seen in my life. I drink from the milk carton because when you think about it, no one cares.
From now on I will spend as much time with my friends and family as possible. I will travel more and eat weird things. I will prepare my finances accordingly so that if something did happen, my family will be taken care of. I will drink watermelon martinis and eat sushi with friends on a Thursday night because I can. I will not dwell on the past because there's nothing I can do about it now. I will live in the present now and worry about the future later. I will not have regrets.
Most of all, I will eat dessert first because in the end happiness in life is what matters most.
Today I will be attending the funeral of a beloved co-worker who tragically passed away on Sunday night at the age of 30. I will also be visiting the gravesite of my godmothers father who passed away 19 years ago on this day. Today is also my mother's 50th birthday.
I think many of us take advantage of what our time on this earth is meant for... it's meant to live and experience and share. Too many of us work too hard, worry too much and don't live enough.
I decided a long time ago that although I have responsibilites and I do have to be a grown up I will not let that stop me from enjoying every minute that I have on this earth. I have travelled more in the last 3 years then most people have in their life. I have some of the BEST friends any person could ask for and the BEST family that any person could ask for. I laugh everyday and tell all of my friends that I love them because in the event that I do leave unexpectedly, I want everyone to know what they meant to me. I don't waste time with people who do not treat me right or who do not want me. I do not love recklessly because I save it for those that deserve it. I love french fries and chocolate and strawberries.
I dance because it is my passion and it's what makes me the happiest. I coach because sharing my passion to those who share the same passion is amazing. I teach kids because there's nothing better than seeing children who want nothing more than to learn from you, so much that they even copy your style of clothing. I love children because they love selflessly and unconditionally. I have 4 year old boyfriends who are the cutest things I've ever seen in my life. I drink from the milk carton because when you think about it, no one cares.
From now on I will spend as much time with my friends and family as possible. I will travel more and eat weird things. I will prepare my finances accordingly so that if something did happen, my family will be taken care of. I will drink watermelon martinis and eat sushi with friends on a Thursday night because I can. I will not dwell on the past because there's nothing I can do about it now. I will live in the present now and worry about the future later. I will not have regrets.
Most of all, I will eat dessert first because in the end happiness in life is what matters most.
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